Thursday, 11 August 2011
so much thinking and praying to do once again. this whole issue of knowing where my focus should be at, cutting off the unnecessary things in my life and not spreading myself too thin has been brought up by five different people in the past 2 weeks, and i know that that's God's way of telling me that it's time once again to pray things over. To be honest, i'm perfectly fine with the way my life is now, yes it gets crazy at times and sometimes i find myself so pre-occupied that I hardly have time for myself, it feels like i'm fighting a war but the thing is, when this 'war' ends and i look back and see what has been accomplished, i'll feel that those few cuts and scrapes i got along the way was all worth it. Of course, I can go on living life like that, but after speaking to my church and rangers leaders, I've come to realize that by piling so much responsibility upon myself, i'll eventually crash and burn.
Learning to say 'no' is one of the things that i've got to learn. I always say yes to people whenever they require me to do something, as long as it's within my capability and i have the resources/time to spare, i'll always agree to it without second thought. However, what Jonathan said to me last sat really spoke to me, he told me that people aren't going to stop asking me to help out, people want me around because they have the confidence that things will get done and that it will be done well when I'm around and as long as this fact remains, people are always going to be coming up to me to involve me in an event or to want me to take up more duties/roles, it's never going to stop and it's alright for me to say no because I need to do what's best for myself at times and I can't keep accepting these involvements cause i'll be wearing myself out. God wants me to be a good servant and at times (in my case) it means taking time off to recharge so that I can burst forth once again to give Him my best.
So much praying to do.
A part of me started wondering if i made the right decision last december when i decided on not making a final decision. A part of me feels that if I had made that decision back then, I probably wouldn't be so torn between having to make all these decisions now. oh well, what's done has already been done right?
♥ cheryllimsuwen, 29/11.
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