Head vs. Heart

Ubin cycling with the boys yesterday was super duper funnn. Finally took up the challenge of cycling on the mountain bike route and halfway through we all thought we were going to die because the path was so damn narrow, and I fell of my bike somewhere along the path, laughing when the guys came to help me up as it was so hilarious, got a painful bruise now to constantly remind me. But the view from the top of the mountain bike trail was so beautiful that it was all worth it. And I love how I know pulau ubin so well, after navigating around during JTT. Really enjoyed the trip especially the super awesome moments where we tried to conquer all the killer slopes and were screaming at the top of our lungs as we rode down on them.

The ring that I wear on my left index finger, it's my purity ring. It's a ring that I put on everyday just before I leave the house and it is a constant reminder to guard my heart and my purity for the one that the Lord has destined for me. Over the years, there have been so many incidents where I almost got myself into relationships, but I'm thankful that each time when it comes to making the decision, God always serves His timely reminders that the guy isn't the right one for me and I'm only going to go through heartbreak after heartbreak if I commit myself to these relationships. And sometimes it's really hard to walk away, but now whenever I look at the ring on my finger, it's a reminder to me that someday this ring is going to be replaced with my wedding band, and on that very day, I'll be standing at the altar standing face to face for the man that God has saved for me. In God's timing, He will reveal His plans for me and the very person for me and in the meantime while waiting, I'm not going to worry about my relationship, I'm not going to look left and right trying to figure out who the right guy is for me, I'm not going to waste my time chasing after what I think is right for me, but instead I'm going to focus on chasing after God and God alone, because He deserves my heart and He deserves to be placed first in my life. I'm not going to shortchange myself and settle for anything less than God's standards for me, because He knows what I deserve the best, a man that is after His heart. And I too am not going to shortchange my future half by giving away parts of me to guys who don't deserve it, I'm saving myself for my him.

typing all of this out as I feel my strength wither away, past few days have been complete hell, living on a few hours of sleep and having super screwed up sleep schedules. Worst part has got to be not being able to fall asleep when I want to, just lying in bed staring at the ceiling and regulating my breathing so as to ease myself into dreamland. So glad that I can officially declare CT's over and also a constant reminder to myself to keep working hard, cause it pays off.

best part of my day was meeting up with the clique for dinner and a random photoshoot. memories oh memories, totally had an awesome time talking about the crazy shit we used to do in school. How we used to do the "chocoboy - hot" thingy whenever someone said the word, how we used to play no laughing games in class, how we used to play touch rugby and be public nuisances in math class, how we miss the leaning akira of 4/1, and the stupid memories we had in science spec camp. Really awesome being able to look back and laugh at all these wonderful moments in life.